Flashbacks to the Squeeze

6.7.06


Sly Venus… she tricked me again.

Color me caught off-guard by the trouble she's clearly capable of causing, happy as a clam in her ruling sign of Taurus. Blame me for not explicitly impressing upon you the dangers of too much of a good thing… especially when it tempts us away from what must get done.

And maybe I should've mentioned Venus's current role, squaring Saturn and opposing Jupiter in an unwieldy clash between (1) pronounced, emphatic indulgence in the earthly delights of food, drink, sex, drugs and sleeping in and (2) the sobering ramifications for our supposed-to-be-humbly-at-work egos. Sorry, I was too busy pandering to my insatiable needs for one or more of the aforementioned pleasures… and doing anything possible to forestall the obligatory calls of duty, such as writing for this website or washing dishes.

I've been arm-wrestling with myself all week, wringing out each bit of bare-minimum effort like it's the only blob of toothpaste left in the tube. Am I almost used up, too? No, just stubborn in my refusal to stay squarely-footed in front of a single task. The weather's too nice. My tummy's growling again. Something else arouses my attention. And off again my body jerks, away from responsibility… and, mesmerized, gravitating toward greed, lust and/or sloth.

Sluggish during the day. Twitchy once more at night, awakened mid-dream to another 4 a.m. glance at the streetlamp shining into my window. Perhaps I'm not tired, so much as distracted by whatever I'm not doing at a given moment… since, surprise of surprises, once I hit the gym, my energy returns to its steady-and-strong endurance levels. Hmmm, what does this remind me of?

Ah, yes, the other time I've experienced such odd symptoms of disrupted sleep, distracted mind, the desire to consume goodies instead of work, and an uncanny burst of exercise potential—during the grand cross of squaring planets, Nov 05-Jan 06. Now, I recall.

And whaddaya know? Venus's current position in Taurus lines up exactly with where Mars was stuck (retrograde and all) during that grand-cross time. Today's Venus makes the same square to Saturn and the same opposition to Jupiter… and unearths a flashback to that recent period, when pressure squeezed down upon us without an immediate ability to release it with new actions and attitudes. We were stuck for a couple months back then… until early-to-mid-Feb 06 or so. Remember?

Though we're not necessarily in a repeat performance—this current situation lasts a mere week or so—we've been offered a reminder of how far we've come since the start of '06. And also of how easily we can succumb again (and again and again) to the appeal of instant material gratification: ample enough bait to make our normal business seem the dreariest nag in the galaxy. For an hour or an evening, we may feel good. But then, if we've shirked the work, disappointment in ourselves can't help but creep in.

Is it really the worst thing to readjust our work schedules for the occasional 'mental health' (or 'irrepressible hooky') day? Everything's okay, as they say, in moderation.

Alas, the Venus-Jupiter opposition (which was exact last night, Tue Jun 6) hates all that's associated with moderation—the reasonable limits, the taking-things-slow, the saving-some-for-another day, those damn single-serving pudding cups. Venus and Jupiter, in cahoots in Taurus and Scorpio, want the whole fucking thing. They'll drink the entire bottle of tequila and eat the worm at the bottom. They'll hump all night, then phone in late the next morning to laze another few hours, naked in bed. And if they make it to the office at all, they'll fill their time with long coffee breaks and e-shopping excursions to expensivestuff.com. As a symphonic duet of self-satisfaction, they couldn't make sweeter music.

Leave it to Saturn in Leo, squaring off against the two, to shut the party down with its harsh wake-up call. The message: On a sincere heart-chakra level, this excessive revelry is not what we want.

'What shit are you talking, Saturn?' you might interject. 'I know what I want! I love to party, dude!' (And if it's not partying, is it shopping? eating? smoking weed and watching bad '80s movies?)

The big Saturn-in-Leo question is, Can you distinguish between (1) your money-hooch-and-nooky-hungry id and (2) your higher self (not that kind of 'high', you doper), who requires discernment and foresight to attain real satisfaction? If the answer is flatly no, then you won't even recognize a struggle in your present lifestyle. (And you probably think all my new-age ramblings are a heap of crap, too. More power to ya.)

For most of us, we're aware there's a difference… but not always perfectly attuned to what our ultimate bliss begs of us, especially with so many tempting substitutes advertising themselves shrewdly and lewdly in our faces. Luckily, no one's asked us to be perfect—just increasingly conscious. That way, when we decide to devour three plates of lasagna and a jug of cheap chianti, we know what we're doing… and that we won't do it again tomorrow and the next day.

Keep this last bit in mind over the coming days, as next week is all about consequences (good and bad) to our actions. When Mars in Leo meets up to conjoin Saturn, we will find our drive to make the right choices ('right' for us, that is) powerfully supported—and our momentum to act in any way that sabotages ourselves firmly blocked.

Soon, we'll discover firsthand that, though we may tell ourselves we can do anything we want, it isn't quite true… unless we're shameless gluttons for Saturn-style punishment.